The Post-Production Blues
I don't want it to be over. Last night I wanted to be happy, and I was, but it was trumped my this overwhelming sadness. This has been the best, most rewarding, trying labor of love in my entire life. And now it's gone. There is no proper way to articulate everything I want to say, to express my profound gratitude to all involved. Words are inadequate, actions are too. Just know that I love you all very much and that I've had the time of my life.
Effing gun didn't go off and projector was out of focus. I felt really good about my performance, about everyone's, but those two glitches really got me down. But, as The Phocian says, we can only control what we can control.
Mom liked it, thought it was good. Not exactly a gushing review, but I wasn't expecting one. I'm happiest with the fact that she got the in-joke; yeah, she knew "Save the Life of my Child" (don't know why I'm so excited about that). Brother and sister really enjoyed it, and I know it's just because they're seeing their big sister on the stage (they're 10 and 8), but I don't care. I'm so glad that they are getting exposed to things like this.
After much planning, a puta and I finally peed in the woods. Very fulfilling. And that's all I'm going to say about that.
Tried to go to the cast party. I'm not very social, and subsequently not into parties, but I went anyway; I earned this one. However, I was feeling so melancholy about everything, I couldn't have a good time. Gah. I don't know what's good for me. The Boy was there, but didn't give me the time of day, though he did spend most of the time with one of my fellow putas (perhaps she was consoling him over something), so that made me happy - putas need to share the love. The Boy Blew me off completely. What a douche. People always told me he was a jerk, but I never saw it. I'm turning into a stereotypical girl. The thing is I never was sad that The Boy and I broke up, I never really cared enough about the relationship. Meh, whatev. And for the first time ever, I really wanted to drink, get insanely inebriated. Well, sort of. I figured it might take some of my pissy mood away. But, ever the responsible one, I desisted. Would have been a silly thing to do, anyway.
IHOP this morning with the family. I got recognized. Random person #3 said the show really made them think. It made me happy.
posted by Spark of Life @ 11/21/2004 11:12:00 AM
2 Comments:
It's your fault no one gave you any time of day. We're all tired of hearing about couples keeping things secret or people admiring others from afar. In life, we must be aggressive in order to get what we want. That can applied to anything really, even things as insignificant as crushes. YOU tell this "puta" your feelings. Chances are, this person feels them too. Trust me.....
No, no. You misread my post. I was with The Boy for a while, and it ended a bit lamely, and he has been a bit cold to me ever since (his loss, not mine; people were always telling me he was a douche, but I never saw it). The puta to which I was referring is female, and The Boy (a bit under the influence if I am to understand correctly) was all over her. I just felt bad for her because I knew what a moron he could be.
Anyway, try reading some of the past posts, you would have understood the situation better.
Who is this, by the way?
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