Her soul is a three-decker sauerkraut toadstool sandwich with arsenic sauce*

As I was coming out of class today, I saw this small group of children playing around outside. Now, most of you know of my thorough dislike of children, and my thorough like of setting them on fire. However, for whatever reason, I was drawn to observe this gaggle for a few seconds.

What a mistake that was.

This girl was running around outside the school on campus singing, "I've got a flower, I've got a flower," and waving her flower in the air. A shy little boy sidled up to her and asked very politely, "Can I have a flower?" to which she militantly replied, "No! Jesus gave me this flower. He did NOT give you a flower."

I think baby Jesus died a little bit just then. And so did I. So did all of us.

*bonus points if you catch the title reference