I just had the WTF moment of my LIFE. This girl named Janet calls and asks me about my relationship with James. She is apparently James's girlfriend. I tell her the whole story about James following me around like a lost puppy and about me doing everything short of entering the Witness Protection Program in attempt to give him the brush. She informs me that James told her something completely different, and that I'd better stay away from him (as if I'm this wanton seductress who's been lusting after him in a black skin-tight dress). I try and convince her that I had no intention of becoming involved with him. Next she tells me "hands off" and then hangs up. She then has proceeded to call me every 10 seconds and hang up. Thank you, Captain Maturity. Hang on.

Okay, she just called again, and actually talked to me. Wow, what a concept. She tried to reiterate that I'd better steer clear of James, throwing in some "back off, slutmonger" type comments. She hung up to talk to James who's on the other line. I fear for his life.

Audrey just got back from dinner, and answered the phone. She's dutifully defending me from Janet's accusations and telling her that I'm not a whore, and whatnot. Friends rock my socks. Hang on.

Okay. I'd just like to take this opportunity to say: I've been had. Who is the "Janet" person I've been talking to? Jacque. Who called and hung up 837 times? Audrey. Man, I....................Man. I cannot even describe the roller-coaster of emotions that I have been on during the last 15 minutes. Holy crap. I have to give them props, though - that was one good prank. Dude, I feel kinda funny. That was so weird.

"I think what you're not aware of could fill an entire book...."